I Love You, Toby
by I'mBelleGoose
Summary: Just over a year ago, Noah offered a loving hand to embrace once Luke got over Reid's death. But now, after running into each other in New York City far longer than Noah intended, Luke has a little surprise that may change everything between the two.
1. Chapter 1

**I'd like to admit that I'm a new fan and only discovered the show about a week and a half ago. I've watched only the Luke and Noah scenes on Youtube, up to where Meg is trying to get Paul to come back with Eliza. Out of curiosity, after I started hearing things about Reid Oliver, I looked up all the scenes between he and Luke, finishing them midmorning on Sunday. I admit, I cried like a baby during those last few episodes. I can't honestly say whether I'm a Reid or Noah fan, but admit that I like and care about both of them, and that I am going to go back and finish the chunk of episodes in between everything else I've seen.**

** Anyway, I'm gonna stop rambling.**

** Disclaimer: I don't own As The World Turns, though I'm not sure who does.**

** Chapter 1**

** (Luke POV)**

Life without Reid had proved to be quite difficult for the first several months after his tragic, "heroic" death. The way life never quite had been before. I surmised it to be for the simple fact that even as little as six months before, I had been unaware a person such as himself existed. It was almost a year later, just as I'd started to get back to being myself-helping take care of his belongings, playing a role in Memorial's new neuro unit, even seeing Chris Hughes about, watching as he took over the chief of staff position-that the pain began to lessen somewhat. For a while, I carried around Reid's stethoscope; when things got too tough to bear, I'd seek out Chris and hold up the end to his sternum. Being the sweet guy he was, he never complained, seeming to understand it's what I'd needed to help steady myself and happy to oblige, especially as it was my ex-boyfriend that had saved his life.

Nonetheless, a year later was when the pain began to subside just the slightest. Coincidentally, that was around the same time my cousin, Jade, showed up on our doorstep once more.

"Luke!" She exclaimed, pulling me into her eager arms immediately. "It's so good to see you!"

"Jade. Hi." I chuckled, pulling back so I could look at her face. "You, too. What are you doing here?" I shook my head. The bright smile on her face began to fade, the light in her eyes dulling significantly. "Oh, no. Jade." I said softly. "I'm not gonna like this, am I?"

"I need your help." She answered urgently, very serious. I stepped aside and ushered her in, closing the door behind us.  
"Alright. What's this about?" I crossed my arms, fearing what would be said, inevitable of causing me stress.

"Is there anyone else here...or are we alone?" She looked around.

"We're alone. Now what is it? Are you in trouble with the cops again?"

"Huh." She scoffed, crossing her arms. "Well thanks for making it obvious how little you think of me."

"You can't really blame me for coming to that conclusion; you're kinda one for getting in trouble." I admitted honestly, shrugging. Anger entered her eyes instantly.

"Whatever. I don't need this." She said, heading for the door again.

"Jade, you said you need help. What is it?" I encouraged. "It must be important, by the look in your eyes." This made her stop short, turning back to me and sighing.

"I met this guy...a while back..." she started. I mentally face-palmed myself. I was _not_ going to like this. "We met at a party and one thing led to another. I-I kinda...got pregant." She grimaced, waiting for my reaction. The face-palm wasn't mental this time.

"Somehow, I don't think this is the end of your story." I hedged.

"Well, I told him and he walked off on me. Figures, right? Anyway, I had him. Our son." She glanced down at her stomach. "He's a month old-" I looked up to notice my mom and grandmother Lucinda quietly entering the house, unashamedly eaves dropping on our conversation, "and I'm just not ready to be a single mother. I've been taking care of him for the last month just waiting until I got back to Oakdale. I knew you'd be able to help me."

"Help you? With _what_, exactly?" I tried to get clarification.

"To find a suitable family to raise him. I want to put him up for adoption." Before I could respond, my grandmother did.

"Why? So you can run back onto the party scene, throw yourself at the first guy who's the least bit interested and open your legs once more?" Lucinda Welsh cried out, anger in her voice. Jade spun around and glared.

"I'll have you know I'm starting schooling." Jade shot.

"It's about damn time you did something useful with your life-though I pitty your classmates and professors. Besides, who's paying for your education? Who did you swindle this time?"

"No one. There was no need to because I got in with a grant." My cousin answered smugly.

"Impossible. You're not that smart." Lucinda scoffed. "Or you wouldn't be getting rid of your own child."

"Mother!" Mom exclaimed, obviously embarassed. "Now, look. He is Jade's son and what she decides to with him is her decision."

"But have you really thought this over?" I asked, making sure she didn't make a huge mistake, only to find out after it was too late.

"I have. I was thinking about it back when I got pregnant. I've known this is what I wanted to do for months. I've also known that you guys are the best chance I have at finding the perfect family for him." Everyone looked around at each other, trying to decide non-verbally if we wanted to take on this job or if we thought trying to convince Jade to keep him was the best way.

"Well, we can certainly give it a try." Mom said with enthusiasm, smiling at my cousin. "It's still early enough in the morning. Do you want to bring him over and have us get started?" Jade nodded, hugging my mom and heading for the door. Grandma merely rolled her eyes and raised her chin in the air as she left. Jade was back within fifteen minutes, carseat cradled in the crook of her arm, little convertible-like shutters closed so we couldn't see the young infant.

"We can put out ads and get a lawyer-Tom. We'll run background checks, host interviews-" my mother started in, so excited to help, having a partial say in what happens to her nephew, not having to worry about any harm befalling him.

As the ladies got nestled into plans, I sat by and listened, not really sure what to do, naturally, as I'd never been a parent before. A soft, heartbreaking cry caught my attention from the little basinette, closer to me than anyone else. I glanced at Jade, making sure she gave me the okay, before pulling back the folds and carefully picking up the tiny boy. I cradled him into my arms and grabbed the full bottle that rested inside the carseat, figuring it was worth a shot to see if he was hungry.

He took the bottle eagerly, greedy on his intake.

"Jade, what's his name?" I asked without looking away from the little boy.

"Toby Art Tayler." She announced proudly.

"Toby." I cooed to the beloved figure in my arms. After a moment, his eyes opened, looking up at me. My heart broke instantly when the blue eyes met my brown, my breath catching completely in that instant of realization. I knew immediately that I loved him. At the thought of my female family members sitting a few feet away, discussing giving him up, my heart clenched painfully, panic clouding my senses and closing tight around me, suffocating. The thought of not being with him hurt. He was mine, I realized. This wonderful, healthy, perfect little boy that was given birth to by my own cousin...was meant for me. I wanted to care for him, to feed him and clothe him and to give him his heart's desires. I wanted to be his father.

And by the smile he managed to give me around the bottle, I was sure he felt the same.

"Wait!" I said urgently, catching all three females' attention. "I want to do it."

"You...want to call Tom?" Mom asked, as confused as the other two.

"No, I-" I looked back down at the adoring face, a lump gathering in my throat and tears collecting in my eyes. I swallowed audibly, looking up at all three. " I want to adopt him." I admitted.

"Whoa, Luke. Are you sure?" Grandma asked, concerned.

"I'm positive." I declared.

"Raising a child is a lot of work, sweetheart, and besides family and babysitters, there are no breaks. It'll have to be all or nothing." Mom explained hesitantly.

"I'm positive. I love him." A few tears dropped as I said this. "I love you, Toby." I told him in a soft whisper. "As long as you're alright with it." I adressed Jade, now.

"Absolutely." Jade smiled genuinely, standing up and coming toward us, staring at his face. "I know you'll take really good care of him." She assured.

~0~

That night, after we'd gotten everything legalized and official, Jade brought over all of Toby's things and I set up camp in my bedroom, promising the little bundle we'd get him a stable crib in the morning and he wouldn't have to settle for his basinette ever again. I wanted to place him somewhere more intimate. At first, on the bed with me, a pillow or two seperating us, but I was just too scared I'd roll over and squish him. My next thought was a nice setup on the floor, but then I could wake up in the morning and-forgetting he was there-step on him. And if not me, someone else. I just couldn't risk him getting hurt.

Jade was propositioned on staying a day or two while she said goodbye to her son. I didn't begrudge her that, but welcomed it. I also meant to ask her how Toby had wound up so pale with brown hair and blue eyes with her African-American heritage, but decided not to, realizing it was probably the father's genes. I also knew I'd have some explaining to do in the morning when Dad and my younger siblings got back from their father-kid weekend, but I revelled in the fact I was given the oppportunity to worry about how I'd broach the subject of the wondeful gift I'd received so recently.

"I love you, Toby. Daddy loves you." I whispered to him as I layed him down to rest that night-and every night after.

** Aww! I thought it was sweet. Some of you might think of it as cheesy, but I tried to effectively portray a parent's feelings to the best of my ability, as I am not one. This was just an informational chapter, really, letting you know how these two ended up father and son. Please tell me what you think in a review.**

** ~I'mBelleGoose**


	2. Chapter 2

**Yay! Today I am nineteen years old! Woot! Haha. I love Luke's full name. Say it with me: Luciano. Mmm. Very smexy. I also love where Noah is leaving Luke's house and says, "Ciao, Luciano," teasingly in an Italian accent. That was rather hot. Okay, no more rambling. **

** Disclaimer: I think CBS or someone owns As The World Turns, if I remember correctly. I don't own anything...except perhaps Toby himself.**

** Chapter 2**

** (Luciano "Luke" POV)**

That night, I woke up to my crying son, immediately remembering and jumping from my bed. Grabbing the little basinette Toby layed in, I headed for the kitchen to make his bottle fresh. I wasn't too worried about anyone else waking up since Toby's cry was rather soft and more whiny than agitated.

After manuevering about the kitchen, I picked up the little boy and cradled him in my arms before feeding him. Had it not been for the other three female occupants of the house, I wouldn't have known to put Toby up against my shoulder afterward and pat his back firmly, but softly so as to ellicit a few burps from him. I'd just gotten two out of him when the third had turned up, not a burp at all, but spit up. I knew it was running down my back, but I didn't care, merely made a mental note to have a towel over my shoulder next time for protection.

In the morning, as the sun streamed through the room brightly, I looked at the clock and realized it was midmorning. Toby's face instantly entered my thoughts, bringing a grin to my face with it. I was excited, feeling almost like one did when they got something they really wanted and woke up the next day to have it there, waiting for them once again. Only the object of my happiness was much more precious.

I went over to the basinette to find my son already fully awake, just laying there and sucking on his puggie. With a touched smile, I picked the little boy up from his carrier.

"Good morning." I said brightly. He tried to smile, but seemed to be having some trouble. I didn't dare remove his puggie, though, knowing it could disrupt him. I kissed him on the cheek and settled him on my shoulder, grabbing his blankie and little stuffed turtle. When I heard Dad's voice (thinking aloud, it seemed) from the other side of the door that led to the living room, I knew it was time to tell him. "Hey." I greeted once I'd entered the room.

"Hey. Who's this little guy?" Dad asked, walking up and having a look at the tiny boy.

"This is Toby...your grandson." I said warily, smiling at all four of them. Dad stared at me for a moment, at a loss for words.

"My grandson?" He asked, trying to make sure he'd heard right.

"Yes. I adopted him yesterday." I explained.

"Luke-" he shook his head in disbelief, "you've never talked about wanting a kid-certainly not recently. What were you thinking?!" Toby began to squirm in my arms, uncomfortable with the rising of Holden's voice. "You don't just spontaneously adopt a child. Having a kid is a lifelong decision that sticks with you and you just choose to sign yourself up spurr of the moment..." He was nearly yelling now, frustration obvious. Toby began to whine, wiggling about in unease.

"Ssh." I whispered quietly, rubbing his back and trying to soothe his distress. "It's okay." After he'd settled down a bit, I turned back to Holden, who looked more annoyed with me now. "Yes, adopting Toby was a bit spontaneous, but I love my son." I insisted firmly. "Up until yesterday, he was Toby Art Tayler; now he's a Snyder."

"Wait a minute." Dad backtracked. "Tayler?" He groaned, rubbing his eyes. "As in Jade?"

"Yes, Jade." I confirmed. "She came by and she was putting him up for adoption and I just..." I trailed off, looking down at my son. "I couldn't let anyone else have him." I admitted. He sighed, but seemed to give in to my decision, understanding what I was saying.

"Can I hold him?" He surprised me by asking. At the curious glint in his eyes, I agreed readily, handing over my month-old.

"Be careful. Watch his head." I stressed. Holden paused mid-transfer to give me a knowing smile. Holden took Toby, holding him in the air to get a good look at him.

"He's a good-lookin' kid, I'd say." Holden smiled at Toby, bringing him in and placing him in his arms. "Has he eaten yet?"

"No. We just woke up."

"Midnight rendezvous?" Holden chuckled knowingly.

"Something like that." I shrugged. "Will you watch him while I make a bottle?"

"Yeah. I've got him." Dad assured.

I went to the kitchen, putting together the slightly warm breakfast. Just as I was finishing up, I heard the door open and my mother's voice.

"Ahh. So I see you two have met." Mom said happily.

"Yes, we have. We were introduced by a very passionate Luke." I heard Dad answer. "Though I don't think I should have found out like that. You could've given me a call and warned me so I didn't freak out." He accused.

"You freaked out on him?" The disappointment in Mom's voice was clear.

"Well, it was kind of a shock-coming home to a grandson that wasn't here the other day when we left." He justified himself.

"I know, it was a shock when Luke stood up and said he wanted to adopt him, but it wasn't my place to tell you-it was Luke's. And I think he figured it would be better to do in person." She tried to reason, hitting the nail on the head.

"Serious matters should be dealt with in person." I spoke up, stepping out from the kitchen. "Here." I put the bottle down and reached for Toby, who Dad handed over easily enough. I removed the puggie from his mouth, receiving a small sigh from my son, before I placed the bottle to his lips. He started to suck slowly, almost hesitant, before he gulped faster, getting greedy.

~0~

Jade returned later and we had started to leave when Mom and Dad decided to join us last minute. We headed up to the store, the basinette in my hand as we walked through the aisles to the baby section.

"Okay." I nodded, recalling my mental list. "Crib, stroller, clothes, changing table, a few toys..." I trailed off, knowing there was more I was forgetting.

"Diapers." Mom supplied.

"Diapers." I agreed, nodding. "I think we might be able to wait on the walker." I added, smirking.

"Yes, Luke, I think the walker could wait." Dad said, smiling and rolling his eyes.

Once we'd grabbed everything we needed, I payed at the checkout, receiving strange looks from a few people who knew me well enough to know I didn't have a biological son. I smiled at them happily until they looked away, killing them with kindness, so to speak.

Over the next week, I introduced Toby to all my family members. Faith and Natalie were overcome with adoration for their nephew, while Ethan was suspicious and hesitant, seemingly taking longer to warm up to him. Grandma Emma loved him with everything in her, often snatching him from my arms for several hours at a time when we went to the Snyder farm. Lucinda didn't coo at him like the others, but it was obvious that she cared for him.

Eventually the people I worked with-at the hospital, shipping company and foundation-met Toby, as well, since I'd taken to bringing him to work with me more times than not. Just two weeks after I'd adopted him everyone in town knew I had a month-and-a-half old son.

I slowly strated to adjust to certain things where Toby Art Snyder was concerned. I got up in the middle of the night-every night-to feed him. I fussed over strangers or mere acquantances getting too close. I worried about just about everything, making a big deal about how anything could harm him: hold him firmly in his basin while giving him a bath or he could drown; make the seatbelt that keeps his carseat in place as tight as possible-even if it takes ten minutes; don't place him on the floor where people could step on him; don't place him on the couch where he could roll off. I mean, _everything_ was a safety hazard with him. Honestly, Mom and Dad seemed more at ease with it all and often had to calm me down when I got too stressed. Then again, they did have four kids of their own.

**Wow. That felt really long. Haha. I'm hoping next chapter is where Luke and Noah reunite...but we'll see. Tell me what you think in a review :D**

** ~I'mBelleGoose**


	3. Chapter 3

**Dr. Pepper rules, though I don't own any Coke products. **

** Disclaimer: I don't own As The World Turns, but I do own Toby Art.**

** Chapter 3**

** (Luke POV)**

Two months after I had adopted Toby, I got sent to New York City to meet with a possible doner of the foundation. I couldn't take the little boy with me, but resolved that that would ensure my quick return to be that much quicker. Grandma Emma decided to watch over him for the few days I was supposed to be gone while I packed a suitcase and took the private jet to the big apple.

Leaving him was hard, but I promised myself I'd make up for it by calling to check in on him consistently. I booked a room and rested there for a couple hours after having arrived. I really wanted to go home and come back the next day when I knew the doner I was waiting on would be there, but knew I couldn't just skip out on my responsibilities like that. Therefore, after I woke from my nap, I grabbed my wallet, room key and cell, and headed out to find something to do.

Walking along the sidewalk, I saw a souvenir shop and dropped in, thinking I'd get something for Toby. Sure enough, I walked out a few minutes later with a necklace I had engraved to say, I love you, Toby, smiling fondly to myself. Sure, he wouldn't have a need for it for a couple years, but the thought of my son having a constant reminder that his father loved him filled me with warmth.

I took a walk, needing something to do beside sit in my room and go stir crazy. If I passed an interesting shop, I'd step inside and have a look around. I was back out walking again when I ended up in a less populated street and quickly realized why. A crowd of people scurried about and chattered anxiously to each other just outside of a shabby, abandoned-looking wearhouse. I looked on curiously as I passed, but continued onward, nonetheless. The sun was beginning to set and I wanted to get back to my room before I got lost in the dark.

I ordered room service and watched some television before I called Grandma Emma, who picked up a little slowly, probably trying to a appease a very fussy little boy, if you asked me.

"Hello?" She asked, sounding a bit distracted.

"Hey. It's me. How's Toby doing?" I asked interestedly.

"Mmm. That son of yours." She said, feigning disapproval. "He's a gripy, squirmy little one sometimes." She ratted him out easily.

"Yeah." I smiled in adoration. "That's my little boy. I just...I just wanted to say goodnight. Could you put the phone up to his ear?" I asked, knowing it probably sounded ridiculous, but knowing I'd sleep even worse tonight if I didn't.

"Alright." She chuckled. "Here he is." I waited just a moment until silence met me and knew Toby was there.

"Goodnight, Toby. Remember, Daddy loves you." I told him softly, meaning every single word with Earth-shattering accuracy.

"It's me, again." The older lady said into the phone.

"I love you. Goodnight." I told her. "And I know he can be difficult, but I want you to know that I really appreciate this."

"Oh, stop it. Every child gets fussy once in awhile. I'm just happy to spend time with my great grandchild and I'd do it anytime. I love you, too, Luke. Good night, sweetheart." And with that, we hung up. I watched a movie that was on TV, falling asleep at some point during.

~0~

The next was miserable. I had almost nothing to do up until lunch, which was my first meeting with the doner. I happened to walk by that abandoned wearhouse on my way to the restaurant-an hour early, I might add. The same hectic activity was going on just in front of the place again. I noticed a few more on the sidewalk with me this time around, though.

"Luke?" A voice asked from a little ways behind me. I turned, my heart stopping when I was met with the sight of my ex-boyfriend, Noah Mayer. As our eyes met and realization dawned, he smiled happily and jogged up. "Hey."

"Noah." I said dumbly, caught off guard when he wrapped his arms around me, hesitating for a split second before I hugged back.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, pulling back.

"I have a lunch meeting with a possible doner." I explained, gesturing behind me. "What about you? I thought you were in LA, making a big movie?" I asked teasingly, smiling.

"Yeah." He nodded, scoffing. "I was. Like five months ago, but then we finished." He said, a bit accusitorily, crossing his arms, obviously hoping for an explanation.

"I'm sorry about that." I shook my head, genuine. "I just-wasn't..." I tried for a way to describe it without hurting his feelings.

"You weren't ready for anything romantic." It wasn't a question, but a statement. An understood fact.

"I just needed some time." I admitted. "It was rough." Noah just nodded at me, smiling, though it didn't reach his eyes. "Look, this is getting serious, really fast." I backtracked, chuckling. "Do you want to do something? I'm open for dinner." I hinted.

"Huh. So we bump into each other after more than a year of not even speaking, and you think an apology and dinner date is just gonna make everything okay?" He asked agitatedly.

"No. Noah. I just thought we could catch up while I'm in town. Sorry to bother you." I apologized, let down that he was acting so offended when I hadn't really done anything wrong. I mean, really, how many times had he insisted he needed a break from me over the years we were together for something less serious than the man he loved dying?

"Luke, wait." He called, grabbing my sleeve. I turned back. "How long are you in town for?" He asked. I shook my head.

"Only a day or two." I admitted. "Not long." He nodded.

"Then we shouldn't waste it. So? You still free for dinner?" He asked with a soft smile. I smirked.

"You know, I don't know. I'm gonna have to check my schedule." I teased. He laughed, pushing my shoulder lightly. "Here, give me your number and we'll figure something out." I suggested, programming his new number into my phone and giving him mine. After a quick goodbye and another hug, I turned and began for the restaurant again.

Seeing Noah again was unexpected and abit unnerving at first, but I couldn't find it in myself to regret it.

**Alright. There's the third chapter. Tell me if you guys like what you've read so far and want the story to continue. If so, I'll write more and update within a week or two. Also, today is my nineteenth birthday! Yay! Leave me love in a review ;D**

** ~I'mBelleGoose**


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